Ever since I was about 10 years old, I have obsessed about my weight. A female classmate made a comment about my ass in middle school when I was drinking from a water fountain. A partner made comments about my love handles. I live in a strange reality where I left behind my tendency to avoid eating in order to help my anxiety and also struggle with weighing more than I ever have, which is not even 200 lbs. at 6 feet tall. It fucking sucks.
NYC noise/doom unit Uniform has a new record called “American Standard,” and from what I just said, can you guess what it’s about? Vocalist Michael Berdan bluntly made it clear this record deals with his bouts with anorexia nervosa and the impact that has had on him. Over these four tracks and 40 minutes, the band—Berdan is joined by fellow founding member and guitarist Ben Greenberg, bassist Brad Truax, drummers Mike Sharp and Michael Blume—strikes out on a confessional, uncomfortable, and hopefully (for Berdan) cathartic record that contains incredibly raw emotion and tracks that likely won’t make anyone’s party mix. And for good reason. This is sobering and jagged, an album designed to help its lyrical creator through a struggle that can and does lead to death for many people.
The 21:16-long title track opens, and it’s unsettling, Berdan howling alone, no music, into the void, but with real, raw pain. “There’s meat on my waist! It hangs on my waist,” and that same thing is screamed about his arms, legs, face, etc. The accompanying cry of, “It can’t be me,” helps hammer home the point, and anyone who ever has suffered with body image surely will be writhing along. Me included. The music then drill as the steam builds, sludgy hell accumulating as Berdan’s calls continue to resonate and do damage, the playing pounding away and stirring emotion, setting fires that cannot be extinguished. The sounds turn doomy and slurry, curdled cries making teeth grind, and then suddenly, a glimmer of hope stabs through. The vocals continue to mangle, as the suffering isn’t over, and the playing spirals, heading into unexpected melody, the light soaring. Berdan’s messages curdle and scathe, the accompanying sounds corroding and fading into dust.
“This Is Not a Prayer” has the vocals crushing, the drums splattering as guitars catch fire, Berdan wailing, “You are right where you’re supposed to be.” Drums batter as the calls echo, percussive chaos makes brains spin in skulls, and chanted howls increase the menace that never lets go. “Clemency” has strings warbling and sludgy guitars attacking, the vocals marring any sense of peace, slashing into chunky, immersive terrain. The mood turns grim and furious in no time at all, battering as the vocals slash like a belt, increasing the heaviness and adding to any sense of desperation. The pressure refuses to relent, locking your head in a vice, forcing you to encounter feelings you perhaps tried to avoid. “Permanent Embrace” wraps things up, guitars wading in mud, and then the energy bursting open, synth rising and cooling as Berdan stabs your buttons. A thrashy wave breaks out and fucking destroys, the pace laying waste, crushing to a blinding finish.
We live in a society that values a certain body type, and anything outside of that is apparently unacceptable, which is horse shit. But here we are, and Uniform capture that on “American Standard” in a manner that is horribly uncomfortable, and justifiably so. It took me a while to warm up to this record because I was seeing my own issues and psychological pain pertaining to my body. This planet isn’t going to wake up to this trauma. Hopefully records like these will make people squirm enough to stop with these ridiculous standards, but we all know that won’t happen. Love yourself and stay alive.
For more on the band, go here: https://www.facebook.com/uniformnewyork/
To buy the album, go here: https://www.sacredbonesrecords.com/collections/frontpage/products/sbr346-uniform-american-standard
For more on the label, go here: https://www.sacredbonesrecords.com/
Meat Mead Metal 